i was working in this restaurant washing dishes in two stainless steel sinks i couldn't reach the bottom of easily i hadn't seen anything like it before and these deep sinks held water that could fill a bath and i needed to hunch right over i wouldn't know for some time that this was a shite job you know i was twelve years old and i was shouted at a lot and i worked all sunday washing dishes hunched over this sink out of sight and washing and passing dishes into the other sink and the water was scalding hot and filthy and there were these laminated pictures on the wall of

picture-postcard-perfect-salads

in round white pottery dishes with a half a peach half a shiny shiny peach and white cottage cheese and i'd feel against my ankles sometimes fresh-air let in through the back from a door held open by boxes of sour lettuce stacked up haphazardly and the smell of pancakes and icecream and pancakes and syrup and pancakes and tinned fruit and i knew then that this couldn't be anything more than what it was but when i carried great towers of plates as many as i could in one go through into the restaurant the lights were bright it was dizzying like walking onto a stage