Bullshit From alecweston ^Pro in Too Much To Declare (2 hours old)

Who needs it? There's a lot of it around.… more

Time for some ol' Country From alecweston ^Pro in Too Much To Declare (8 hours old)

Just a small-town girl 'til she learned to twirl Then she set the world on fire Like a drive-in Cinderella in a Chevy named desire. So leave your teddy bear at the country fair Honey, Hollywood's… more

The political biscuit From alecweston ^Pro in Too Much To Declare (21 hours old)

I have abandoned my attempt to become Prime Minister. I never watch X Factor, and have no favourite sweet biscuit. PS Is there a country where these considerations do not figure in the political d… more

Pacific Shampoo From alecweston ^Pro in Too Much To Declare (23 hours old)

I'm going to wash that man right out of my hair And send him on his way. Are you ready boots? These boots are made for walking Wait a minute! That's another song! And walk is what they'll do One o… more

Is From alecweston ^Pro in Too Much To Declare (1 day old)

there anything we can do about it?… more

Replica Sex From alecweston ^Pro in Too Much To Declare (1 day old)

What is a 'replica handbag' anyway? A replica gun is a gun that doesn't actually do what a gun is meant to do, ie fire bullets. A replica handbag would look like a handbag, but actually be unabl… more

Jewellery? Is the answer disembowelment? From alecweston ^Pro in Too Much To Declare (1 day old)

I woke in such a good mood. Then, as I was checking another site, eight Comment emails arrived in less than 10 minutes. Yes - the jewellery gangster. It has put me in a bad mood to go through… more

Not caring a Fuck From alecweston ^Pro in Too Much To Declare (2 days old)

"I like you best," she told me more than once, "when you don't care a fuck." We had brilliant sex.… more

Sorry... From timsuzi ^Pro in My Secret Garden (2 days old)

Tim apologises to all his blog-friends, he hasn't gone forever, but BT have not honoured their agreement regarding Broadband and he is unable to access the internet at the moment. He looks forward… more

How far away From alecweston ^Pro in Too Much To Declare (2 days old)

(What's wrong with the guy? If its not penguins, it's fragments from South Pacific) How far are they? Philidelphia P.A Princeton N.J. How far are they? From coconut palms To banyan trees… more

V penguins are coming From alecweston ^Pro in Too Much To Declare (2 days old)

This afternoon, evening, whenever I close my eyes - and sometimes when I don't - I see a sandy beach, and coming towards me a V-shaped formation of minuature penguins. Thousands of them, waddling. I… more

Few things feel better From alecweston ^Pro in Too Much To Declare (2 days old)

... than the morning after a bout of heavy cold. I mustn't overdo it. Suddenly everything seems possible. Don't exaggerate. Why not exaggerate? All those tasks I have pushed aside for months - I … more

News about Mary From alecweston ^Pro in Too Much To Declare (3 days old)

Mary had a little lamb, Whose feet werefleece was white as snow. And everywhere that Mary went, The little lamb did go. … more

The hills From alecweston ^Pro in Too Much To Declare (3 days old)

are alive to the sound of music.… more

Event of Day From alecweston ^Pro in Too Much To Declare (3 days old)

Trundle over to MacBook. Blog 3 sentences, Trundle back to bed again.… more

Life is... From alecweston ^Pro in Too Much To Declare (4 days old)

too full of cliches to be real. (That's what COLDIMOL does to me. Pumps a milliletre of cattarh from my head, and replaces it with crap phliosophy)… more

Muffled From alecweston ^Pro in Too Much To Declare (4 days old)

Today, inside me beats a quiet heart, oddly enthusiastic about life when this attack is over. But it's surrounded by cotton wool, phlegm, apathy and asprin. Yes, I have got a cold, but if you wi… more

Uh, uh From alecweston ^Pro in Too Much To Declare (5 days old)

All afternoon I have been unaccoutanably depressed, my throat is sore and getting sorer. Even after a bath my body is aching. Every so often I feel disoriented. I fear a heavy cold approaching. … more

Napoleon Bonaparte once said: From alecweston ^Pro in Too Much To Declare (5 days old)

"Josephone had the most beautiful cunt in the world, but she lied too much."… more

Too Many Pixies From alecweston ^Pro in Too Much To Declare (5 days old)

'Small beer' Blyton banned by BBC for over 25 years Despite later being adored by soyunperdedor and some other of my favourite friends Enid Blyton's work contained too many pixies, newly releas… more

Life is like a loaf of lemon From alecweston ^Pro in Too Much To Declare (6 days old)

Fallen and forgotten, without a goodman's name, She dreams of Indiana while she walks the streets of shame. "'Griselda was a doormat. She was probably one of those dames that if you slug 'em, the… more

Lumps of Male Clumsiness From alecweston ^Pro in Too Much To Declare (6 days old)

5 rhythn dancing again, Good music, Great energy, great dancing, Two hours, non stop. I'm all screwed up, though. Why do men have to take up so much room when they dance? Most guys see no differ… more

Okay, Christmas From alecweston ^Pro in Too Much To Declare (6 days old)

Now this is a post where you - friends, aquaintencies, passers by (but not spammers) are allowed, ney encouraged to offer me advice: What the hell do I do for Christmas? For me, the "family option… more

Not to worry you but ..Moving House - Part 1 From timsuzi ^Pro in My Secret Garden (6 days old)

Well I’m back online, did you miss me? Now I have read recently that moving home is somewhere near the bottom of the top ten most stressful activities that one can experience, below divorce (done tha… more

Corpsing From alecweston ^Pro in Too Much To Declare (6 days old)

"Well, Carruthers, I will be blunt. When we throw your torso into the fire, there won't be much left of you. So I will say good-bye now and congratulate you for sacrificing yourself in a jolly good … more

Oeufs Alec - a real buzz! From alecweston ^Pro in Too Much To Declare (6 days old)

I have often fantasised about seeing my name on the menu. Having a dished named after you is form of immortality. Think of Beef Wellington. Think of the Sandwich. Okay, enough grandiosity. … more

CHURLISH Intermission From alecweston ^Pro in Where the Rainbow Begins (7 days old)

… more

Wedding just the first step From alecweston ^Pro in Too Much To Declare (7 days old)

My wedding feat (see previous post) was by no means the most ominous I have encountered. The best man at my friend Angela's wedding opened all the congratulatory telegrams - including one from one … more

No Food at the Wedding From alecweston ^Pro in Too Much To Declare (7 days old)

One of the dismal tasks I undertook this morning was trying to sort out my State Pension. Apparently my pension will be reduced to take account of the fact that I was married for six years, ending … more

No 'Helpful'Suggestions From alecweston ^Pro in Too Much To Declare (7 days old)

please. But sometimes I find writing it down helpd me find a way through on my own, which is the only way. I feel deeply depressed today, and at the moment can't find any energy to pull myself thr… more